Forget
by kaitothegreat
Summary: Whenever he thinks of her, he'll run. For ten minutes. Just long enough to forget her for a while.


Forget

Whenever he thinks of her, he'll run. For ten minutes. Just long enough to forget her for a while.

* * *

Hijkata remembered the day when he could hear Mitsuba's heart broke.

He rejected her confession coldly without hesitation, telling her that he didn't once care about her in any way before leaving and never turned back.

What a stupid and evil man.

When he knew that he was no longer in Mitsuba's sight. His leg almost gave way as he grabbed a tree for support. He wanted to kill himself so badly, to end his stupid and insignificant life when he was the reason that the most beautiful woman in the world to him was shattered into pieces. But Hijikata didn't have a choice. He would love to bring her to edo and have her to stay by his side forever, but it's a long and dangerous journey and there wasn't much chance that he would survive at all.

Hijkata sucked in a deep breath and steadied himself. After preparing his stance, he took ten minutes of continuous running before he finally reached his doorstep. He felt a little better after everything that had been bothering him that moment.

He was able to forget about Mitsuba for the whole day.

.

.

He remembered the day when he spat out the spicy snacks before realizing his tongue was on fire.

He coughed a few times and stared at the half eaten snack in his hand. He almost forgotten, it's nearly the end of the month and around this timing, a package would be delivered to Shinsengumi and it's filled with all these extra-super-beyond spicy snacks and crackers. Holding onto his breath, he forced himself to finish the opened packet of crackers. It was late at night and he was preparing to go out and patrol around town when he thought that eating some snacks before doing so wouldn't be so bad.

"Ah, Toushi!" Kondo slapped his back and Hijkata choked. Ignoring the fact that the vice-captain was gasping for air, Kondo continued. "So you're the one who always finished the snacks! I always wanted to try them but I never got the chance."

Hijikata wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "It's Sougo who finished eating them, not me."

"Ah is that so? That boy sure loves his sister more than anything else!"

Not knowing where the conversation was going, Hijkata stuffed the packet of spicy chips into his pocket, deciding to finish them later. He took his sword on the counter and headed to the door. "I'll head out to patrol for a while." He informed.

"Alright. Oh, by the way." Kondo paused, making sure Hijikata didn't leave the kitchen yet. "I received a letter inside the package as well. Mitsuba-dono is coming to Edo next week."

Hijikata stiffened. After a long while, he glanced back. "What for." He muttered.

"She's going to hold a wedding here, to a businessman." Kondo finished his sentence in a solemn tone, observing his trusted right hand man.

"Is that so?" Hijikata drawled, more as a statement instead of a question. He continued his way out of the kitchen and without knowing himself, he was already on the empty and quiet streets in the middle of the night.

All the while, he was trying to focus on his objective of a police to protect the town and maybe to look out for Katsura, but he couldn't. His mind was filled with the woman he thought he would never see again in his life. It's not like he didn't want to see her, but he felt like he didn't have the rights to even look at her anymore.

So he took in a deep breath, getting into his position and started running all the way down the streets. Excatly ten minutes later, he had reached the other end of Kabukicho.

He was able to keep her out of his mind for that night.

.

.

He remembered when Sougo and him were in the same car and on their way to this hospital.

That sadist was silent, for once. Same goes for him. Kondo and Yamazaki knew better to even say anything to the two men that needed peace right now.

When they reached the hospital, Sougo jumped off the car without looking back and rushed to where everyone knew he was going. Hijikata didn't say anything and let Yamazaki dragged him towards the hospital to treat his injuries while Kondo tried to catch up with Sougo.

An hour later, after getting his injuries bandaged and everything stitched up, Hijikata pulled himself from the bed and left his ward. Yamazaki didn't stop him at first, thinking he was going to see Mitsuba for the very last time, but when he turned to the other direction, he immediately stopped the vice-captain.

"Vice-captain! W-Where are you going? Okita-san's ward is right there!"

"Who says I'm going to her ward."

"B-But if you're not going to see h-her, you shouldn't be moving around!"

"Back off." Hijikata growled, struggling his way to the stairs. Yamazaki watched him from behind, knowing there was no way he'll persuade him at all.

"I'll watch him." Gintoki patted on Yamazaki's shoulder. "Go and find your other tax robbers."

When Hijikata finally reached the roof, he stood by the railings and watched over the town below him. His trembling hands reached over the packet of extra spicy snacks kept in his coat that the stupid perm head threw to him beforehand. He tore it open and took a piece of cracker out, staring at it.

Wasn't it great now? This would be the last time he would ever need to eat this spicy and weird-tasting cracker again. He didn't have to see her, even if he want to, he would never get the chance to anymore. This got to be the best punishment he deserved. His lips quivered.

Hijikata couldn't run, not in this condition even if he were to force it. That's why he didn't have the chance to control his tears from flowing, so all he could do was to blame on the spiciness when he started eating it for the next ten minutes. He tried his hardest to swallow, but most of it were stuck in his throat. Despite that, he still continued stuffing more and more crackers into his mouth, numbing his taste buds in seconds.

In the end, he didn't forget anything at all.

.

.

During the funeral, he sat in the corner alone, staring quietly at the ground without saying or doing anything.

After that funeral, he ran for the whole night and didn't come back home until dawn. Kondo didn't question him.

.

.

For the rest of his life, Hijikata dedicated his life to Shinsengumi and fulfilled his role as a demon vice-captain. Nothing else mattered to him anymore other than to serve under Kondo and protect the town and the ones he swore he would protect till the day he dies.

But sometimes, even when he tried really hard not to, he would think of her; Her laughter, her kind smile, her soft voice, her eating habits.

And whenever Hijikata thought of her, he'll run. For ten minutes. That didn't allow him to forget her forever, but just long enough to forget her for a while.

* * *

I felt a little proud of my "Won't forget" fic for Kaito/Aoko and felt like writing the same one for HijiMitsu too. My heart kinda ached when I type this fic, sigh... HijiMitsu is really a tragic thing...

No plot bunnies for any detective conan fic for now so I'll just use my same old ideas for other Gintama fics since I _also_ don't have any new plot bunnies for it as well. Sigh... what a loser I am haha


End file.
